It’s over 6 months since our wedding. Holy mackerel. I’m surprised thinking about it even though it does feel like an age ago now.
What can I tell you in hindsight about our wedding day? It really does pass you in the blink of an eye from the minute the ceremony starts. Nobody can prepare you for how fast it’s going to go. I was determined I wasn’t going to be emotional so I could try and take it all in but it still felt like a dream sequence gliding from one part of the day to the next. Definitely make little pockets of time with your other half to stop, talk and breathe.
We came in pretty much bang on our budget. We spent a lot less than the so-called average but nevertheless a considerable amount of money and in perspective we bought a house with around the same amount. We did get help from our parents but we paid a big chunk of it ourselves. From the get go we aimed not to get into debt and we just about managed. Our three biggest spends were our photographers, rings and Robert’s kilt. Yes, his get-up cost more than mine!
It’s absolutely ok to splurge on a wedding. There are moments in life worth celebrating and it’s worth doing it justice. The act of getting married isn’t expensive – there is nothing stopping you from paying the nominal fees and going down to the local registry office in your jeans – but the vast majority of us want to throw a wedding. I actually think it’s good to talk about the relationship between money and value in the wedding industry and finding your happy balance; it’s easy to get swept into the comparison culture of thinking that non-essential items are must haves and as a result your budget spreads thin.
The majority of purchases you will make are just for the day but your documentation is part of your legacy. A lot of photographers will talk about wedding photography as being an investment; they will put a monetary value against their packages but our photographs and video are priceless. (See blurb above about it passing you in a flash – please don’t wish in hindsight that you’d booked a better photographer.) I am a video convert - don’t get me wrong, we didn’t get a full wedding video but the 5 minutes of highlights tells the story of our day to a tee and I’ve watched it over and over and over again. I look at my sparkles from Chisholm Hunter at least once a day; the diamond band to compliment my solitaire engagement ring was absolutely worth it. Sometimes pushing the F it button is the best decision you can make.
(Continued after photos)
We were really fortunate to be largely gifted our Italian trip of a lifetime by our wonderful friends and family. We thought a European honeymoon would be easier on the purse strings after paying for a wedding, but realistically we probably could have had 4 nights on Mars for the cost of 4* hotel hopping and fast-training it cross country. We ran out of money 4 days before we came home so we did have to hack into the overdraft to maintain the celebratory lifestyle. Reality hit home when I did a big stock up shop at Lidl on our return that cost the equivalent of 5 beers in a Capri bar.
Would we change anything? Not a chance. Was it worth it? Absolutely. Every decision we made embraced our ethos as a couple. From holding our wedding on Sunday because we like Sundays, bringing the dog, having an unplugged ceremony, involving our families as much as we could and serving mac ‘n’ cheese and steak pie for our wedding breakfast. I even got a replica of the dog made as a groom’s cake because I love my dog (and husband) that much.
After a whirlwind few weeks I was excited to get back to work and hear about other people’s plans and ideas, that’s the wonderful thing about being so invested in the Scottish wedding industry. I would definitely say I have a heightened sense of empathy now I have done it myself, because boy at times is it tough. Wedding planning is a journey; at times stressful, eye opening and it can be nasty, but equally heart warming, uniting and fun.
Good luck Team Bride – Team Wifey is awesome.